Rants

Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino gives you another reason to avoid fitness magazines

By November 4, 2010 13 Comments

Mens Fitness and Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino are a match made in heaven

Television star (The Jersey Shore) meets trashy, ‘unhelpful in any way or form’ magazine. I admire a person that trains, keeps fit and enjoys life, but when someone gives themselves a moniker such as ‘The Situation’, I roll around on the floor laughing (or ROFL as you kids call it these days on the interwebs).

This site is all about debunking gimmicks in the fitness industry (for the most part anyway ;)). Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino is a gimmick in every sense of the word.

Here is some of his finest douchery

I could sell t-shirts standing still,” he says. “Everybody loves me – Babies, moms, dogs…cougars! I have unbelievable mass appeal.

Yes, the mass appeal of root-canal.

Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino gives you another reason to avoid fitness magazines

‘Yeah I’m confused — I dunno why I’m on here either’

Why else Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino is lame

Yes, The Situation has biceps, a four-pack of abdominals and an ‘ok’ chest, but he also looks like he’s never worked on his back or shoulders in his life. Only the mirror muscles Mike? How many chin-ups can you do? Not many?

But who cares right — it’s ‘Arm Day’.

Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino gives you another reason to avoid fitness magazines

I can’t even imagine the type of person that would wear one of these…

Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino even has a t-shirt

A ‘window’ on the abdominal area. How cute. I’d like to see one with ‘nipple windows’ or maybe a pair of shorts with a ‘twig-and-berry window’.

That’ll give you a REAL situation to deal with my friend.

Need more proof?

Here’s a blurb from Too Fab

Want abs like Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino? Well, in the upcoming issue of Men’s Fitness, the hunky star of “The Jersey Shore” offers up 8 tips to get a rock-hard body.

8 tips? How fricken special

I love the blurb on the front cover too…

How to drink, party and get abs like these!

What the hell. A magazine couldn’t be any more irresponsible even if it hired Mel Gibson as its chief editor.

I’m pretty sure that NONE of Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino’s 8 tips will offer you the ‘the holy grail‘ of advice on how to party your arse off and get six-pack abs at the same time. As I mentioned in tuesdays post, the whole six-pack abs thing is well out of hand right now and magazines such as this do nothing but exploit that fact.

Maybe I’m being too harsh on Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino…

Perhaps I need to go and buy a copy of Mens Fitness and then post an article on it telling everyone how I discovered ‘the holy grail‘. Or I could just shoot myself in the face…

</end rant>

Clint Nielsen

Author Clint Nielsen

Clint is a dad and husband trying to stay in shape. He's also a highly opinionated fitness enthusiast and author of Reveal The Steel. Follow him on: Instagram, Twitter, Facebook and Google+

More posts by Clint Nielsen

Join the discussion 13 Comments

  • JAMA says:

    some people need to die…

  • haha good call … yeah believe it or not I have never seen Jersy Shore but I hear a lot about it.
    So I don’t know who this dude is, but really his body is pretty ordinary looking… seriously I wouldn’t even call it ripped!
    It goes to show its all in the marketing and that’s that Brutal reality of ShowBiz ( and life sometimes)
    Raymond

  • Cassie says:

    Juggs…seriously…?

  • marcus says:

    I admit, I am a subscriber of men’s fitness and compared to other fitness magazines,most of their workout programs are good and usually aim towards functional strength and total body movement. Nonetheless, I can’t believe they put him on the cover…lol. Some of his 8 tips (drink plenty of water, eat lean meats, etc) will help getting lean but I know damn well the situation doesn’t follow those tips…lol. At the end of the day, it is about burning more calories than consuming, and if you ever watched jersey shore, it can’t be anything but that.

  • I used to work at a gym just north of Toronto that was loaded with dozens of douchebags like “the Situation”.

    I don’t recall any of them having nicknames but I do remember them standing in front of the changeroom mirror primping and preening like a bunch of 16 yr old girls.

    The manager of the club actually asked me to stop laughing at them while they sprayed each other with Axe body spray.

  • Its so true.. the thing I find about the jersey shore is that its like watching an African tribe on the discovery channel… you cant believe that they real, that they really think this way and act this way, but for some reason you keep on watching because its so ridiculous that its almost entertaining to laugh at… I’m not sure if the situation is as bad as all of us that watch it… I think thats the worst part cause we’re making him rich.

  • ugh it just keeps getting worse and worse with this guy. you know he’s actually endorsing “protein infused vodka”? unbelievable

  • He has a new book coming out called…

    “Douchebag Fitness for Mirror Athletes, How to Flex your Narcism for mAss appeal”

    He’s making good progress with the book. After 6 months he’s on page 3.

  • Haha! I must be the only girl to have read this post so I feel it needs to be said: “Mass Appeal”???!!!!! Haha!

  • I have bought a couple of the UK edition of Mens Health over the years, spread out with months between. One thing I have noticed with them that is just another reason not to bother is that when I look back through them almost all of them contain the same useless information written slightly differently. Also I don’t get how people like Mike ‘The Situation’ manage to maintain even a hint of a six pack or any sort of muscle mass with the diet and lack of sleep them must put their bodies through.

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